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You Don't Know Me

by Wes Carroll

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1.
Was our decision justified? Would going back destroy our pride? Was there more to this ride than ups and downs? Will we discover love again? Can we fall back and just be friends? Or is this the end of all the good we've found? But each time I try to find our place You always show your fighting face And all I can do is shut down for the night I feel my balance ebb away Along with all I want to say My answer for today is "Fine, you're right." You don't know me. You don't know me. Each decision I review Just vindicates my sense of you You know it's true: I'm through, and so are we A broken vow, a lonely beer I don't know why it wasn't clear Your failings came from fear and not from me Finally I've come to see That you are not the one for me But I just can't believe I never knew That each thing you said you didn't mean Each time we fought and made a scene Was an argument between just you and you. You don't know me. You don't know me.
2.
Canyon 03:15
We're made from different stuff, and sometimes that's tough, but you're finding out my hidden places Seems like it takes so long, but that makes us strong, Discovering your subtle graces You ask if you look good with your hair down By now you know that that's not why I stick around You reach out across the canyon Each time the gap's a little less wide You reach out across the canyon That's the reason why We look for most our lives for husbands and wives But they never know us when they meet us We seek the life sublime but that takes some time They take a while to complete us You ask if you look pretty in that gown But we both know that that's not why I stick around. You reach out across the canyon Each time the gap's a little less wide You reach out across the canyon That's the reason why So many pretty faces were such a waste They fell away and slowly faded You're made of different stuff and that's why this love Has melted all that once was jaded You ask me to compare the love we've found You'll find my answer in the way I stick around You reach out across the canyon Each time the gap's a little less wide You reach out across the canyon You make it seem it's possible to fly You reach out across the canyon Each time the gap's a little less wide That's the reason why That's the reason why
3.
One more day. Another day closer Close to perfection but farther and farther from me You don't know what you're looking for But you know what makes you afraid Now I know what freaks you out about the plans we made You know how to move. You run like a spark But you get the hell out every time you all short of the mark Don't run away even though you can This time you could just stand strong Take my hand and breathe and just hang on And run like hell in the other direction If you believe, you can chase it down Take what you got and make the correction That's how you keep the sky from falling down Take a breath. Wipe off your face Put down the paint that no one but you can erase Look at yourself: no longer a child You can get what you need if you trust that you're gonna be fine But you don't have to be in that fable You could be good in a different song I don't think you know that you're that strong So run like hell in the other direction If you believe, you can chase it down Take what you got and make the correction That's how you keep the sky from falling Run like hell in the other direction Be the one to chase it down If you believe then it's not a defection That's how you keep the sky from falling Run like hell in a forward direction Take my hand; we'll chase it down Look what we've got and make the connection That's how you keep the sky from falling down
4.
Broken streetlight, remembered perfume Favorite t-shirt: imagining on you Broken bottle, brick and concrete view Lonely storefront: the glass I'm looking through Bumpy sidewalk, weeds are pushing through Pixie flower brings me back to you I'd like to do something sometime Something sometime Anything anytime I'd like to do it with you Ribbon roadway, trees are racing Wind is screaming like razor punk guitar Empty starlight: the brightest thing by far Night air circles alone inside the car Final hilltop; city comes in view Crest that gentle curve, it brings me back to you I'd like to do something sometime Something sometime Anything anytime I'd like to do it with you My mind is always feeding my distraction Imagination heeds a higher call Little things just trigger recollection You're always at the center of it all Little pieces of wishful thinking It's just a daydream I'd like to do something sometime Something sometime Anything anytime I'd like to do it with you
5.
Angel 04:40
Never thought I could be an angel Maybe why I'm having a hard time walking this straight line Trying to chart my path with no direction north Turning and turning in circles Trying to hang on to what I've learned Just when I started to think it was over I see that train coming around the bend Looking so sweet I'm tempted to board Decision coming around again An open door I have passed before I'm not trying to be an angel It's more like I'm trying to lift myself up from the smoke Far too easy to get distracted Voice at my shoulder keeps on pulling me aside Pushing me in circles Barely hanging on to what I've learned Just when I started to think it was over I see that train coming around again Looking so sweet I'm tempted to board Decision coming around again An open door I have passed a hundred times before
6.
I Tried 03:23
If I tried to show you, tried to know you, made a show of the things below you Would you know? If I tried to meet you, tried to you reach you Oh, all the things that I could teach you Could you go? I tried so hard to hold you I tried so hard to stop your crying I tried so hard to make you see the light Oh, lord, I tried Oh, yes, I tried If i tried to tell, to unshell you, Oh, I promise you I wouldn't try to undersell you Do you know? If I tried to strut up, Be a cut-up, Oh, I wouldn't blame you for telling me to shut up Do you know? I tried so hard to hold you I tried so hard to keep you away I tried so hard to think of what to say Oh, lord, I tried Oh, yes, I tried I tried so hard to hold you I tried so hard to stop your crying I tried so hard to make you see the light Oh, lord, I tried Oh, yes, I tried Oh, lord, I tried
7.
Animal 04:52
Just face the facts You can't go back Every time you reached inside, you found A yearning you can never turn around You are an animal You are an animal like me Your lovely mind So clean inside But the chaos that your body sees as art Is the reason that I've loved you from the start You are an animal You are an animal like me You fuss and fight But you know I'm right Your platonic mask would surely have you hide The fire in your gut you can't deny is all that keeps us warm inside You are an animal You are an animal You are an animal like me
8.
Sensitive 02:53
One glance is a poem to you but I can't see through your subtlety One glance is not the right way to get me to say what I feel Anything you want, anything you need Anything you want, anything you need You said You gotta tune in You gotta be incredibly sensitive You said When you're with me You just gotta be sensitive Anything you want, anything you need Anything you want, anything you need You never gave me a reason to doubt That you wouldn't just walk out But then again, I could only ever guess You never gave the thing that I need That you would just talk to me Apparently, with you, more is less You said You gotta tune in You gotta be incredibly sensitive I didn't know you meant words are cheap tokens I didn't know you think promises aren't spoken But anything you want, anything you need Anything you want, anything you need
9.
Think Of You 03:41
A pair of clouds is gathering way high They're headed east across the bay I can't help but think about the dreams in which I float across the sky I bet they're happy just to spend a pretty day side by side Now it seems like they aren't going anywhere The wind has changed but I don't think they care Bet the view is damn near perfect up there Seems like all I ever do is think of you And there's a bumblebee hovering near a perfect bloom It's like he's worshipping the smell he's floating in It's times like these I think about our crazy busy lives And how I'd rather just spend a pretty day by your side So there's work to do but beauty to take in And I think I know which one of these will win The sound of tiny wings makes for a perfect afternoon Seems like all I ever do is think of you On a field of sun and grass and lazy summer birds Two trees provide the only shade for miles No one recalls a year before their sturdy branches spread proud They've stood together all the while And we all know that they aren't going anywhere It seems they'll stand forever side by side I'll bet their fruit is sweet beyond compare Seems like all I ever do is think of you
10.
Signs 03:57
Sometimes random walks in open clearings Sometimes reflecting on my Brownian life Bumping into nascent possibilities Sometimes searching for another path Maybe everything has hidden meanings Patterns give themselves up before us Insight laid out before our casual eyes Connection: warp and weave of human being Looking together for the meaning in signs Everyone wants to see a hidden meaning Everyone, everyone, everyone, everyone So here we stand, hand in hand We're watching for the signs So here we stand; hold up your hands We're waiting for the signs We hope that we are more than automatic humans More than bloody, bony, brainy beasts We hunger together for inspired purpose Look up, look in, bow down and share this feast Everyone just wants to have a sense of meaning Everyone, everyone, everyone, everyone So here we stand, hand in hand We're watching for the signs So here we stand; hold up your hands We're waiting for the signs Here where the hero stands alone Constant in trust of what he knows Even here we band against the unknown And conjure a parent-king in the sky, watching from his throne So here we stand, hand in hand We're watching for the signs So here we stand; holding up our hands We're waiting for the signs So here we stand, hand in hand We're watching for the signs Here I stand, with head in hands, as you look up for the signs

about

Production began in early 2007 on this CD, meant to be finished later in the year. Joke's on us! In 2009 we declared it DONE, except of course that we then spent two more years finishing it.

I think the thousand tweaks made it worth the wait. But if you disagree, you can check out the 2009 version here instead. Enjoy!

credits

released October 27, 2011

All songs (c) Wes Carroll, except Angel (c) Cynsa Bonorris and Wes Carroll, and Something Sometime (c) Austin Willacy and Wes Carroll.

Sound recordings (p) 2011 Jonathan Minkoff for MinkoffARTS.

Mastered by Nathan James for The Vault Mastering (NYC).

Album art by Julia Tenney.

Photography and Photoshopry by Zalman Stern.

Art direction by a team of monkeys taking a break from banging out a play by some dead Scot.

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Wes Carroll San Francisco, California

Mouthdrumming.com beatbox instructor turned math coach for gifted high-schoolers (wescarroll.com) completes long-awaited solo album, claims "Polymath" achievement.

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